THIS TRUTH. IS SETTING ME FREE. It has only taken a thousand years- probably half my life- to find the rusty skeleton key to open this lock!
As I pull the arrows, one by one, from the depths of my heart, I am finding this ONE TRUTH which has been deeply embedded for most of my life. Compounded by people, situations and by my own self.
The view is gruesome, yet it is an oasis. It is bloody, yet pristinely gleams with a pure and brilliant light. It is called TRUTH.
Bloody arrows lying on the ground around me, once extracted, resemble beautiful flowers resting at my feet.
The lies of the dark, smooth-talking thief told me, “it’s no big deal…” And I listened- all the way to my [near] demise. “It’s NO BIg deal.” I thought to myself, “why am I SO easily torn? These lies are no big deal…”
I was wrong.
Today is a day of reconciliation with my own heart; a day of Praise to my Father. Today, I faced an ugly TRUTH which has clearly been a huge deal. Quite frankly, I’ve held it for many years because I’ve seen so many who have faced far worse than I.
Awake, awake, Zion, clothe yourself with strength! Put on your garments of splendor, Jerusalem, the holy city. The uncircumcised and defiled will not enter you again. Shake off your dust; rise up, sit enthroned, Jerusalem. Free yourself from the chains on your neck, Daughter Zion, now a captive. (Isaiah 52:1-2 NIV)
As I let this TRUTH be free, I assure you, it’s not necessarily the severity of the actual acts, as it is the compounded grief they’ve caused over the course of my life- to this point.
Sick men have taken advantage of me and I’ve hid it. It’s dirty. I’ve felt bitter and powerless for so long. I’ve reacted by attempting to turn the tables. I’ve pushed my husband and countless others away with my distrust, not fully knowing why- until now. Today, I can open my mouth [my keyboard] and allow the truth to flow.
From the separation of my parents when I was very young, to the worst of the sick situations, I have grown increasingly bitter. My prayer is for this to reach a soul like mine. One who tries desperately to fix themselves and who listens to the lie: “it’s no big deal.”
“Therefore hear this, you afflicted one, made drunk, but not with wine. This is what your Sovereign Lord says, your God, who defends his people: “See, I have taken out of your hand the cup that made you stagger; from that cup, the goblet of my wrath, you will never drink again. I will put it into the hands of your tormentors, who said to you, ‘Fall prostrate that we may walk on you.’ And you made your back like the ground, like a street to be walked on.” (Isaiah 51:21-23 NIV)