God answers prayers.
I recently endured one of the scariest times of my life:
My complete and utter (short-lived) refusal to accept the circumstances In my life. A horrific and disgusting day filled with my heart and voice screaming at God. Which led to my compounding guilt and shame before His Precious Throne. I felt the greatest pain and The most incredible numbness, all at the same time. I couldn’t sing or even force out a single prayer of gratitude. Darkness was surrounding me (or so I thought.) I had thoughts of never caring again- never loving again- never feeling again. I was truly broken and nothing seemed possible other than an eternity of dispare.
Sound dramatic? It was. God had faithfully answered my prayers in a way I would’ve never imagined. In previous days, I had prayed for wisdom, peace, humility and patience. He is All Powerful. He is Present. He is Faithful.
In the days that have followed, I have been on a Journy of seekinganswers given to me through His Word. I am in a state of total and complete humility and Awe. I wish I could note more about the trail of scripture that led me out of the “pit” in which I had fallen, however, I was hurting and trying to journal- I became so bitter and angry that I ripped several pages from my journal and now they are crumpled up in the console of my car..so I’ll start off with a verse that prompted my healing (journaled after the page ripping episode):
Ephesians 5:11-14 …and trust me, I was not wanting to admit anything other than total defeat at this point, “…but everything exposed by the ligHt becomes visible – and everything illuminated becomes a light.” V 13
My lack Of Trust was exposed and my lack of Faith Came trapsinG right along With it.
I’ll Continue in a future Post On this lesson learned. Until then, may my humble testimony be a blessing from God, for God.